ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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