Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
