I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize