i can't believe i had my finger in that
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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