i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I can't turn off my feet"
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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