Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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