ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize