they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
