My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
