Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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