making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
