just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
My ass is underappreciated
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
