once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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