ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
