I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
You can't just leave with hair like that
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
