handjob tips. give me some.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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