so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
