How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
