Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
