I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
