brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
