Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
