Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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