Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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