Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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