so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Randomize
