was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I am spending my child support on dildos
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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