you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
