I wish i was in the wii world.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
