I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
