"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I bet he comes in French.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize