As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize