its not stalking. its research.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Randomize
