yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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