Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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