This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
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