Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
