And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
