grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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