Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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