i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
