I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
