I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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