So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize