can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize