just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
