If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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