He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
