my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
