You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
